Let me explain.

Women are just as responsible for love-shyness as the man who is love shy.

First of all, many women are cowards.

Humans are afraid of the unknown. When a girl meets a man who is shy, she can't read him. He is therefore categorized as "unknown". Because of this, we have an automatic fear response that translates as "This guy is a creepy weirdo."

He might be an awesome person. He might be her soul mate. But just because he isn't readable, he's written off.

Or lets say he tries to approach her, but he's nervous. All she can read of him is his nervous energy. This makes HER nervous. Because of this, she has an automatic fear response that translates as "This guy is a creepy weirdo."

Secondly, many women are users

What do all women have in common? They CRAVE male attention. Something to do with their daddies or something. But every girl wants to be treated like a princess by a man.They also want to find a rich man, a bad ass man, or a man like Edward from Twilight.

However, sometimes they'll come across a man who isn't rich, isn't a bad ass, or isn't Edward from Twilight. But he's a man, and he treats her like a princess, and that's male attention. He pays for her meals when they go out, he doesn't complain when she drunk dials his number at 2AM. He brings her chicken soup when she has the flu. He'll pick up her dog from the groomers.

So she'll keep him around to feed her ego until a rich bad ass Edward from Twilight comes along. Then all of the sudden, he was "just a friend." And that's when she'll act all shocked and surprised when he gets upset over it. "But we were just friends!" she pouts.

So the guy feels bad and apologizes and sticks around because all she does is BITCH about her Rich Badass Vampire boyfriend, because maybe then she'll give him a chance.

Riiiight...


Thirdly, many women have low self esteem, and don't feel they deserve a nice guy

Perfect example. My friend Charlene. She had a SWEEET fiance, who treated her well, and even though she had kids with another guy, asked her to marry him.

She was abused as a kid. When she was little, she was raped. She hates herself. When everything was going well for her, she instinctively feels that that is "wrong". So what did she do? She cheated on her fiance.

She now has a live-in boyfriend who won't pay rent, is mean to her children, and controls her every move (to the point of telling her what she's "allowed" to wear).




It's not just the love shyness that can stop a guy from getting love. It takes two to tango, and the world is full of messed up men AND women.


I can say this because I am a woman.

Sweetie, this is my entire point. IF women would give decent guys a chance THERE PROBABLY WOULD VERY FEW CASES OF DATELESS MEN.

I get SICK of saying stuff like this. When I voice opinions along these lines, I am called names for it. I am a decent man. I am polite, intelligent, caring, respectful and I CANNOT get a woman. Yes, I cuss and rage and argue on this forum. I do so, because this is the ONLY place I have to talk about things like this.

I have in fact, given up all hope of finding love. When my finances improve I shall be making regular use of escorts to deal with my sexual frustration. I am also encouraging my fellow posters to give up on you females as well. I think it is the only way to hang on to one's sanity and what shreds of self respect might still be present.

Good analysis of illogical female behavior.

"But just because he isn't readable, he's written off. " - I agree, but women often claim that they like mysterious guys. Or should I say mysterious alpha males?

"They CRAVE male attention" - Right on, but only from men who are socially dominant or handsome. Shy guys who try to be attentive are ignored or labeled "creeps". I treated my oneitis like princess being always for her. But her relationship was more important than giving me romantic chance.

Great post, Mirror. I don't have much to add, except that it makes a lot of sense.

On this subject, there's a shortage of proper dads nowadays. Men shy away from becoming proper heads of their family because dominant fathers are demonized. There is a reason for this, as there have been a lot of psychopathic fathers that have come to the attention of the media through their traumatized children (while psychopathic mothers are more often put in the spotlight on their own, as victims, but that's an entirely different issue), but the end result is that men who want to be good fathers tend to err on the side of caution by forfeiting their traditional role as the backbone of the family unit.

Daughters suffer from this as well. Aside from the pedophilia craze which may make dads more self-conscious than in past decades, the modern sexualization of young girls may make dads uncomfortable. I once read that daughters report that their fathers stop being physically affectionate with them as they reach puberty (they see something wrong about letting their daughter sit on their lap after a certain age), or were just never physically affectionate towards them to begin with - something which was reportedly more common in previous times, contrary to the stereotype of men being cold and distant.

I think today's atmosphere puts good dads in a corner, which may be why some of them choose to overcompensate with submissiveness and frequent gifts - thus breeding generations of entitled materialistic princesses.

I've known girls who have grown up in more traditional households (rural), with more traditional values about parental roles. While they have ended up being emotionally closer to their fathers, that - paradoxically - gave them more independence and self-respect in the field of relationships.

The core problem is this;

It is acceptable to be introspective, quiet and thoughtful if you are a girl. It is NOT acceptable if you are a boy.

I am not interested in sport. Soap operas. Shitty dance music. Trendy clothes. Flash cars. The latest smart phone. Big Brother. The X factor. Which celebrity is cheating on whom. Binge drinking. Smoking weed.

I am intelligent, reserved, articulate and highly moral.

In short, I do not belong inn this society.

Were it not for my niece, I would pack some survival gear, some weapons and head North, as far as I could physically get.

Great post Mirror!

Women are a problem foremost as mothers, not doing their job with either their boys or girls.

Maternity behaviour is a learned respons. It's a vicious circle.

What do you mean with that?

I mean that a mother shall prepare her children for life. Like putting things in a backpack. She shall equip her child with a sense of self worth, a sense of - and actual competence and self trust so that the child can take on lifes challenges with eagerness instead of self doubt.

Do you know that status in a group of apes is inherited from the mothers. A mother ape who has high status/value doesn't interfer or overly foster her child.
Instead he let the child explore and seek comfort when he needs it, and then gives it. Thereby letting the child grow stronger and more confident

An anxios mother constantly interfears and thereby making the child insecure full of selfdoubt. If she also is cruel the child grows up expecting to be treated badly.

A secure mother shows her child what love is, the child recognise love and is safe knowing that he will be good received when expressing affektion. The child Knows that it is worthy of love.

An anxious mother aren't emotional available for her children, she therefor neglects them even if not by will, she also rejects them, and places her worry on to them, making them anxious

An anxious mother don't have the strength of making normal demands on her child, she may overpretect and thereby rob the child of a sense of competens.

An anxious mother sets up a lot of prohibitons, not to do that, or not to do that.
This is in contrast to the high status secure mother who is all about allowing, supporting and reasuring.

Are you familiar with the term "learned helplessness" ?

The post above very short

A boy raised to be insecure will have great difficulties approaching the opposite sex.
A girl raised to be insecure will not only have great difficulties, but will also seek a man who "seems" to be secure and who she thinks can protect her. She will very often choose the man others are afraid of

Are you implying that (love)shy men are the way they are because of their mothers?

I'm shure this will be true for some but it will also not be true for others.

And that doesn't change the fact that women are part of the problem like it was pointed out in the post of the topic starter.

No not that it is the mothers fault, and I didn't speak of LS in typical but more general about women and our shortcomings as a gender

Women are cowards - yes we are tended to be raised to be passive, and also aren't validated when competent. Instead women often are validated when pretty
A self confident woman are safe enough to be curious of the unknown

Women are users. - yes we do the household things but otherwise we are brought up not to touch the mens area - we are not competent skilled enough and therefore the oportunity to get things is to choose a man who can best provide. The thing about attention is not getting any from daddy, but also because this is many womens ONLY way to feel self worth. She is nothing without admiration and she knows it. Again women validated for looks not competense In this group we have the narcissistic women aswell, but all women aren't narcissistic

Women have low selfesteem. yes again.
But I would like to point out that there isn't a cluster men sitting totally perfect except of their loveshyness. Both I and Mirror have described the bordlerline type of women drawn to danger and self- injuring behaviour in many forms. But again all women aren't borderline types





Of course women are a part of the problem, there are cruel and viscious women, as same as there are cruel and viscious men.

I think it's time for a maleinism movement, to put things in perspective. Sometimes men are the victims and women the offenders.

But that is not allowed to even think and I think it has to do with the fact that we see woman/motherhood as something holy. Women are not all saints victims of the patriarchy. Earlier perhaps when we where dependend on a man because we had no rights

But things are different now, it's time women take more responsability

there's the MGTOW movement that i believe is going to become bigger in the coming years and decades

Yeap. It's all over the internets. Men are wising up real fast now that so many are not making bank like they used to.

If and when the male pill hits the market, its going to be hell on earth for the skanks who try to trap men with child support.