Hey guys, I came across this site because one of my friends sent me a link to it while making fun of most of the guys here (I'll try not to do this). I'm here to tell my story.

I grew up very much like most of you guys. I didn't have a lot of friends, didn't get any attention from girls (girls would make fun of me by pretending that they liked me). This was the case throughout high school and college. Met a girl at the end of my undergrad. I liked her a lot (and looking back I don't know why, she wasn't all that good looking). I confessed to her, and she proceeded to jerking me around for months with the possibility that we could be together. Eventually I lost it and told her off.

At this point I'll 23 and haven't had any experience this women. I wanted to improve my chances with women though. So I started googling. Came across a dating forum (sosauve.com I think, I honestly can't remember though). The guys there said I should start going out and approaching women. So I spent a bit of money buying nicer clothes (I used to dress like shit) and groomed myself better. Then I would spend thurs - sat nights at clubs approaching girls. First I would just practice saying hi, then getting them to dance, then getting their number, etc. Started getting dates when I was 24-25. But I didn't know what to do with women so I'd screw it up and wouldn't hear from them again.

In that time I had dates with lots of women, probably 3-4 different girls a month (I was also probably approaching hundreds of girls each month too). I started to get better with the dates but it never escalated to sex (which I now know was my fault, all I had to do was a make a move, instead I was waiting for the girl to give me a signal to make a move, which will never happen). Finally just before my 26th birthday I had a date with a girl that I braved escalating on and fucked her (on the first date too). Sex was ok, a lot less exciting than I thought it would be. After that I was a lot bolder with the girls I would date, the next year I fucked 20 different girls.

It was about this time that I finished grad school and started working on my career. And I only started working on my health by going to the gym 4 days a week and eating healthier (I've gotten into great shape in the last 2 years, I'm currently 175 lbs w/ 8% body fat). So from 26-27 all I did was work, exercise, go on dates, and go out to clubs to approach women (I increased the amount I would go out to 4-5 times each week).

I'm 28 now, with a great girlfriend (we've been together 8 months, but I still date other girls on the side). I'm a completely different guy from 5 years ago, but that's because I've put in the work to change. Everything from working hard at work, to working out, to eating healthier, to approach lots of women so my social skills improve has helped me become more successful with women and with life. I wanted to post this so you guys could realize that it's not all doom and gloom. That you could change. But it's gonna require enormous amounts of effort. Nothing in this world is free, and no guy is owned a great woman by his side. Become a great man and everything else will fall into place.

well your friend sounds like a tool, but that is an interesting story.

Virtually impossible story since there aren't that many available women at clubs. Most of them have already been monopolized by a few influential hot guys and there's no way in hell you could ever get near enough to say "hi". There just aren't enough to ask out, because after counting out all the girls who are there with boyfriends, or with hordes of other guys around who want to try their luck, it boils down to a handful of chicks who are more or less always the same when you go out at night. Say, you do this at ten different clubs, you still exhaust your possibilities fairly quickly. Most girls don't even want to talk to ugly guys there.

And you must be ugly if you haven't gotten pussy until age 25 despite trying. No change in clothes is going to change your bad facial genetics.

Lmao, you must be trolling right? I don't know what city you live in but in mine the clubs are packed with women. The clubs purposely make it hard for guys to get in. You either need to come with women or have contacts. I have the contacts (have a few promoter friends). Plus there are always a couple of shitty general admission clubs where you can go to practice talking to women (this is where I went before I made the contacts to get into the good clubs). Maybe they won't have the hottest women, but if your not getting laid you can't really complain.

I'm actually quite good looking, but when I dressed like shit and didn't groom myself properly I looked like crap. And at the time I wasn't in shape. Didn't have much muscle and had twice the amount of body fat that I have now. It's entirely possible to change yourself completely if you put the effort in.

No trolling here. Even on "Ladies' nights", there are about 85% guys at my clubs, no matter which city you go to. It can be a 100'000 inhabitants town, or a 2 million inhabitants metropolitan area, there is always going to be a shitload of guys around, always significantly more than women. Clubs are sausage fests and it's almost impossible to compete with the others, since they are almost exclusively damn good looking, toned, tanned, jacked and ghetto-style hot. There is no difference between clubs since it's prohibited by law (and enforced) that clubs actively filter the people that get in. There is still some filtration going on by higher entry fees for men and no entry fees for women, but most guys here are horny as fuck and $20 entry fee to a club and getting a fuck-buddy is still better than $60 for a one-time whore.



Yeah, see, I am as good as ugly. I can dress however I want, it doesn't improve my facial genetics. I have low body fat now and am working out regularly to get more muscles, which isn't happening as good as I'd want it to due to my body's inferior genetics. I lose muscles basically as quickly as I gain them. When I work out, I feel the muscles, after two weeks they grow noticeably, but my body metabolizes them away until the next session, and I just can't go to a gym three hours a day for seven days a week, every single fucking week. No fucking time for that.

People like you assume that for others it's the same as it is for you. I could go to all sorts of clubs, never get anything unless I luck out big time. But luck I can't deal with, since it's not reproducible. There's nothing I hate more than luck.

i dont doubt that you are trying to be helpful, but you dont seem to understand the severity of love shyness,so i'll try to explain it for you. first off, love shyness is not mere shyness that can easily be cured by socializing, its extreme anxiety when trying to approach a person of interest, most of the time the anxiety is so severe that love shys will chicken out and not act on their desires. sometimes we do work up the courage and we'll actually approach a girl only to be rejected, but why? because women are not attracted to shy nervous guys, they want confident smooth talkers, and when they see a guy like me who is obviously a nervous wreck they just arent impressed. so it becomes a vicious cycle for us loveshys, we are rejected because we arent confident and our self esteems get lower and lower until we transform into all the bitter, angry and pathetic guys you and your friend find amusing on here. alot of us will get rejected so much that we ultimately give up trying to get women and accept the fate of dying a virgin or buying escorts/prostitutes lmao. again i think you've got some great tips for the guys here, i'd reccomend that anyone get in the gym and dress nice and practice good hygiene, those are all great things to do, but they wont solve our love shyness and anxiety which will ultimately ruin our chances of ever finding a woman. even if we dress nice and have a good physique women are still gonna pick up on the severe shyness and anxiety we radiate and get freaked out and reject us.

You've only tried once and you could have gotten laid that night if you had the balls to push through with it. You're the worst flip-flopper I ever saw. I know how easy it is to fall back into one's old routine of never going out but you must keep trying if you want to break out of incel for good. Incel is your habitual state now because you've settled into it and feel comfortable with it. In your case it's become a choice.

Are you eating properly? Working out is one thing but you have to eat properly as well or else the results you get will never be that great.

People make effort but fail anyway. Success is not a monotonic function of effort.

Genetics is a partial player, to be sure. No need to work out that much; you can overtrain and potentially strain muscles. Lift heavy twice a week (each workout being at least 30 minutes of intense lifting) and you should see improvements that tend not to fade.

Also diet is a huge factor when lifting. Remember that when you lift your actually damaging your muscles. You need to give your body enough protein to repair your muscles. And you need to give your body time to heal as well. Working out 3-4 days a week is plenty.

You can work out daily if you want but then you have to spread it out more, do something different, a different muscle group every day of the week for example or do some cardio on some days etc

Why the hell should I? Other guys don't have to change to get a girlfriend, it just falls into their fucking laps. If they don't have to, then I don't have to either. If that doesn't land me a girlfriend, then fuck it. I want to be appreciated the way I am, and I like the way I am now. I'm not sticking a tremendous amount of effort into something that's supposedly as easy as ordering a pizza. And it's not like I can change much about myself anyway with my autism.

I find it typical that you say no one owes us a relationship. No they don't, but they do owe us a bit of fucking courtesy and the time of day, both of which especially women (most of them anyway) don't give me. And I also believe society owes me happiness. I believe the pursuit of happiness is a part of your (the United States) constitution as it is of most constitutions. Well, right now I can't fucking pursue my happiness, can I? I'm actively being prevented from doing so by means of romantic and social rejection even though I've done nothing wrong.

Advice like this implicitly or even explicitly assumes something is wrong with us. Having Asperger Syndrome was no problem a few decades ago as evidenced by my uncle (mother's older brother) having successfully procreated (three children) despite exhibiting many of the characteristics of Asperger Syndrome. The reason that we're not getting any is because society is fucked up: the unemployed semi-criminal member of a motor cycle gang is going to get laid a lot in his life while I - with my academic achievements, spotless criminal record, polite behaviour and general non-abrasive, non-intrusive attitude - have to pay hookers to get any.

Women want a quick bang for their buck nowadays. You have to impress her with your witty personality, awesome social skills, body language etc. in the first few minuts. If you're in any way shy, introverted or inhibited, you're fucked. Despite having many positive traits like trustworthiness, dependableness, politeness and intelligence, I and many other Aspies like me have to undergo the agony of permanent involuntary singledom. A psychopath is going to get laid before I ever will because women never give men like me a chance; but if they don't want me, I don't want them. Given what women and society value nowadays, I think I'll stay alone.

This shit always comes noncels and cured incels. I hoped to God that whomever on this board gets cured like you, doesn't start to repeat the bullshit pop-positivity mantras of society like you do.

I think it's funny that you say that your being prevented from pursuing happiness (which I assume means a relationship to you). No one is prevented you from doing anything but yourself. You don't have a woman because you have little to offer a woman. Why would a woman want to be with you? This is where bettering yourself comes in. You mention that other guys don't have to do anything, well hate to break it to you but you are worse than other guys, that's why your in this place. I was there one time too, but the difference is that I admitted that I sucked and changed. If your not interested in doing that and think that someone will just give you shit then you are sorely mistaken. No one really gives a shit about anyone other than themselves.

But when it comes down to it it's a choice you need to make. If you choose to do nothing than fine, but I would seriously consider some other proactive action.