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PostPosted: 09 Jan 2011, 22:40 
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Yes I do the song thing too, always one particular song associated with my oneitis in which I fantasise about her whilst listening to it. :D

The furthest I have got with a oneitis from what I have initiated myself is small talk, I can never get beyond that.
My first oneitis at school I fell for because I thought she liked me. She did flirt with me a bit and even sent me my only ever Valentine card but I think a lot of that was due to her teasing as she knew I liked her a lot more and she had other boyfriends etc at the time. I was never able to flirt with her myself and the most I ever got was a hug.

With my next oneitis I never got past the small talk stage and I only started talking to her after about 2 years of liking her. We both happened to be on the same coach going to a sports match and I was sat next to her. I remember she did try to tell me a joke but due to my social ineptness the conversation never really got past smalltalk. I over-analysed what she said to me for ages, and whether there was a sign she liked me. It drove me insane and this was the time when I started lo look up these things and learned what 'Limerence' was. It matched my experiences with my oneitis perfectly.

On my current University oneitis I've done nothing more than a couple of short conversations. I was in the same tutorial group as her and would be stood outside the room alone with her for about 5 minutes wanting to talk to her and being unable to start any meaningful conversation.

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"Limerence is not an ability but a drive, a motivation. The conscious mind looks for success and prestige. The unconscious mind hungers for those moments of transcendence... [when] we are lost in a challenge or a task, when a craftsmen feels lost in his craft, when a naturalist feels at one with nature, when a believer feels at one with God's love. That is what the unconscious mind hungers for." (David Brooks, March 2011)


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PostPosted: 11 Jan 2011, 10:34 
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simon wrote:
Yes I do the song thing too, always one particular song associated with my oneitis in which I fantasise about her whilst listening to it. :D

The furthest I have got with a oneitis from what I have initiated myself is small talk, I can never get beyond that.
My first oneitis at school I fell for because I thought she liked me. She did flirt with me a bit and even sent me my only ever Valentine card but I think a lot of that was due to her teasing as she knew I liked her a lot more and she had other boyfriends etc at the time. I was never able to flirt with her myself and the most I ever got was a hug.

With my next oneitis I never got past the small talk stage and I only started talking to her after about 2 years of liking her. We both happened to be on the same coach going to a sports match and I was sat next to her. I remember she did try to tell me a joke but due to my social ineptness the conversation never really got past smalltalk. I over-analysed what she said to me for ages, and whether there was a sign she liked me. It drove me insane and this was the time when I started lo look up these things and learned what 'Limerence' was. It matched my experiences with my oneitis perfectly.

On my current University oneitis I've done nothing more than a couple of short conversations. I was in the same tutorial group as her and would be stood outside the room alone with her for about 5 minutes wanting to talk to her and being unable to start any meaningful conversation.



Well, you are doing better then me, then. I usually fall for a Oneitis from a distance and can almost never speak to them or show any feelings that they can detect, with only a couple of times, when I could smile at them.

Thankfully, I have only had three "Ones", over the years, since I was 16, including the current One, however.

I could care less about most other women when I have a Oneitis girl on my mind. In a way, I think that helped me overcome enough of my LS to get laid before I was 30.

I simply didn't care all that about the girls I fucked since my Oneitis woman was all I really wanted, all I ever needed, in a woman. Being alone most of the time is pretty rough sometimes, but not being with, or at least in the picture, with the One is I really want to be with, tears me up even worse. Its quite unbearable at times.

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PostPosted: 11 Jan 2011, 23:31 
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Relatively speaking, I haven't got very far at all with the girls I've had oneitis for. Usually just casually speaking to them and that's really been it. I certainly haven't managed to become friends with them. Often they have been girls who worked in shops and bars, and yes they were friendly to me and sometimes noticeably more than with other customers, but there's also no doubt that was all about sales custom. So these girls have been quite distant, not being girls I met via work, a social group, etc.

It looks like I'm just entering a oneitis situation again with someone who's just started volunteering at my workplace. There have been loud and clear indicators of interest from this girl and that, for me, tends to cause oneitis because it doesn't happen often. I was distracted from my work for over an hour this morning by the idea that a professional actress and model is showing such an overt level of interest in me, I'm just so staggered by that, or is this more like limerence? Yet already she's the oneitis girl I've got furthest with since I met her at work, there's been a lot of flirty eye contact plus she said I can feel free to phone her at any time.


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PostPosted: 12 Jan 2011, 06:26 
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After yearning for her for 6 years, I asked her out. She said "no." That was decades ago, and I still think about her.


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PostPosted: 12 Jan 2011, 23:21 
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A-ha! You're a misogynist blaming a gender for his own issues. I just KNEW it!! No wonder you can't get laid because women can se..... wait... what???

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I've aksed two women on dates in my life, but the dates never eventuated because I never followed up with them.

I did get rejected by one lady. I was rejected when I tried to talk to her, I got the message she didn't want to talk to me. I'm not sure what happened whether she noticed my anxiety or if I had said something else to upset her. She had been kind to until that point, I guess I fell in love with her. It devastated me, and has lead to me developing serious social anxiety and depression. I find it hard talking to anyone these days.

I've moved on and am living my life and enjoying myself and doing the things I love. I'm really not looking for love with the opposite sex, I enjoy my idependence too much.


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PostPosted: 16 Jan 2011, 07:04 
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Boronia wrote:
I've aksed two women on dates in my life, but the dates never eventuated because I never followed up with them.

I did get rejected by one lady. I was rejected when I tried to talk to her, I got the message she didn't want to talk to me. I'm not sure what happened whether she noticed my anxiety or if I had said something else to upset her. She had been kind to until that point, I guess I fell in love with her. It devastated me, and has lead to me developing serious social anxiety and depression. I find it hard talking to anyone these days.

I've moved on and am living my life and enjoying myself and doing the things I love. I'm really not looking for love with the opposite sex, I enjoy my idependence too much.


exactly the same as me, marisa all but killed me, hurt very bad, causing alot of strange things to happen like fear of people and a crushing darkness and post nuclear war like feelings. for ratslicer marisa marked the beginning of the end of the age of girls and the beginning of a new age in which girls are no longer the focus. i also really dont seek a relationship anymore, theres better more important things to do like bettering myself and trying to be as good at my future career as possible and then if i live to be old, quietly fade away...


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PostPosted: 16 Jan 2011, 08:28 
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Had her with her legs spread begging me to fuck her on numerous occasions.

And no, I never did.


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PostPosted: 16 Jan 2011, 08:47 
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Loner Stoner wrote:
Had her with her legs spread begging me to fuck her on numerous occasions.

And no, I never did.

:shock:

Wait, this was your oneitis you're talking about?

Loveshy or not, if it were my oneitis, I couldn't get that zip undone fast enough! :lol:

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I am talented. And interesting. Not my fault that women prefer dickheads. Their loss....NOT mine.



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People were created to be loved.
Things were created to be used.
The reason why the world is in chaos,
is because things are being loved,
and people are being used.


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PostPosted: 16 Jan 2011, 09:11 
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Adam82 wrote:
Loner Stoner wrote:
Had her with her legs spread begging me to fuck her on numerous occasions.

And no, I never did.

:shock:

Wait, this was your oneitis you're talking about?

Loveshy or not, if it were my oneitis, I couldn't get that zip undone fast enough! :lol:


Well, she was my oneitis back in school but we didn't hook up for years later.

Truth be told, she's still the only "oneitis" I ever had. But that's mainly because I'm never around women these days so I have no-one to get attached to.

She was very decent looking. Unfortunately in the years that passed she had morphed from a very sweet and innocent girl into a super she-bitch. :lol: Her personality was such a turn-off to me that I just couldn't do it.


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PostPosted: 19 Jan 2011, 19:47 
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I talk to her a lot, but in physical terms I once rubbed her wrist, with her looking bemused.

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PostPosted: 21 Jan 2011, 06:46 
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She was my girlfriend for five years. Constant kissing and hugging, travelling, living together, promises of marriage. I know it seems like a lot, but all that required an incredible of trust-building and willpower. Five years of breaking down barrier after barrier, until we were both extremely comfortable with each other.

It only took her one month to build the same kind of relationship with the next guy. :confused2:

Loner Stoner wrote:
She was very decent looking. Unfortunately in the years that passed she had morphed from a very sweet and innocent girl into a super she-bitch. :lol: Her personality was such a turn-off to me that I just couldn't do it.


Same happened to her. Do they tend to get tired of being good girls?


Last edited by Small Pink Blob on 03 Feb 2011, 19:25, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: 25 Jan 2011, 19:35 
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i had oneitis for this girl i liked my freshman year of highschool. i talked alot to her in 9th and tenth grade. in 11th grade i went to another school and we still talked and finally i told her i liked her and she told me she liked me. but then i got scared and basically abandoned the situation. then about a year after i graduated school i met up with her at a party and we started making out and eventually i got her in bed and we were gonna have sex but i was too drunk to get my dick up so i just ate her out. we still talk, but havnt done anything else.


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PostPosted: 03 Feb 2011, 17:28 
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Held her hand for a few seconds. Shit, that's a far as I've got with any girl without having to pay her. And I'm 27.
Depresssing stuff.

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PostPosted: 19 Apr 2011, 10:46 
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A.J. wrote:
Now that's really the end: I located her on FB recently


And for what it has led...


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PostPosted: 20 Apr 2011, 05:23 
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The longest rejection back in high school took me 3 years to realize that I had wasted my time, money, and energy. She used to come to my house and I used to cook for her every time and we even shared the kitchen once which felt really crazy at the time. We used to work on our school projects. Of course I mention that and I'd get the "sure you did" gestures and what not. I wanted to make music with her for crying out loud. Good God I was a weak pathetic fool back then! :evil:

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