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What do you think women think of you?
I am attractive. 10%  10%  [ 17 ]
I'm an good person, but not boyfriend material. 40%  40%  [ 64 ]
I am creepy. 14%  14%  [ 22 ]
I don't exist. 36%  36%  [ 59 ]
Total votes : 162
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PostPosted: 23 May 2010, 05:28 
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I don't exist.

I am unemployed so i spend most of my time in isolation.


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PostPosted: 23 May 2010, 17:30 
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That i'm a sweet guy, someone they can talk to but wouldn't consider having a romatic relationship with. :facepalm:

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PostPosted: 23 May 2010, 18:02 
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One huge caveat here: what you think women think of you, and what they actually think of you may be very different.

A poster mentioned on another thread that LS types often don't recognize opportunities when they're confronted with them. I sometimes have only realized that a girl was coming on to me months, or even years, after our encounter. A lightbulb moment: Oh, that's what she must have meant! I always assumed that no girl within hailing distance of sanity could have any interest in me, and so interpreted whatever she said to be congruent with that assumption.

I've improved in this regard as I've gotten older, although it's still my default position.


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PostPosted: 23 May 2010, 18:53 
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Probably one word: "sexless".


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PostPosted: 24 May 2010, 01:10 
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Interestingly enough, I do believe a lot of women find me attractive. It's not so much that I particularly like my own looks, it's that I've been approached by the opposite sex several times in my life. And yet, I'm 26, and I've never even been on a single date. So, in some objective sense I do know that plenty of women find me sexually attractive. I've taken from this fact, that I must have an extreme case of incel, which makes me feel very pathetic. At least some incel guys can claim that no, or few girls, has ever approached them. I can't say the same with regards to myself. :facepalm:

Inb4: You have high standards.

I don't have very high standards.

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PostPosted: 24 May 2010, 01:21 
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Ghost wrote:
One huge caveat here: what you think women think of you, and what they actually think of you may be very different.

A poster mentioned on another thread that LS types often don't recognize opportunities when they're confronted with them. I sometimes have only realized that a girl was coming on to me months, or even years, after our encounter. A lightbulb moment: Oh, that's what she must have meant! I always assumed that no girl within hailing distance of sanity could have any interest in me, and so interpreted whatever she said to be congruent with that assumption.

I've improved in this regard as I've gotten older, although it's still my default position.

This is an issue, but I think most people here have been around the block enough to understand when a girl is into you or is just being friendly. There are people here including myself that go MONTHS without female interaction, so there is no way to know if a girl is into you if you don't even have a sample size. From my experience with good looking male friends, it is usually blatantly obvious when a girl is into you. The questions only arise when the girl is not into you but the dude is naive and thinks girls give mixed signals. (the guy wants to believe she is into him)


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PostPosted: 24 May 2010, 01:27 
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Ghost wrote:
One huge caveat here: what you think women think of you, and what they actually think of you may be very different.

A poster mentioned on another thread that LS types often don't recognize opportunities when they're confronted with them. I sometimes have only realized that a girl was coming on to me months, or even years, after our encounter. A lightbulb moment: Oh, that's what she must have meant! I always assumed that no girl within hailing distance of sanity could have any interest in me, and so interpreted whatever she said to be congruent with that assumption.

I've improved in this regard as I've gotten older, although it's still my default position.




I don't think most of us are one of those asshats that assume that every women who says "hello," wants to jump their bones. If anything, we probably undervalue/misinterpret the responses we get from women. I know I've experienced the same situations you mentioned.
It's like some nightmare where you're reeling in fish left and right, only to have them slip out of your hand back into the water each and every time, while most of the time when you've had a bite you didn't even know about it.

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PostPosted: 24 May 2010, 01:47 
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Rossini wrote:
From my experience with good looking male friends, it is usually blatantly obvious when a girl is into you. The questions only arise when the girl is not into you but the dude is naive and thinks girls give mixed signals. (the guy wants to believe she is into him)



It's usually very easy for me to tell what's going on between 2 people as a third party observer.
But the therein lies the psychological factor in these situations. Our perception of how women are reacting, from the 1st person perspective is skewed by our anxiety, hopes, and past failure. Therefore, our interpretation of how women are responding to us, via nonverbal ques, is almost totally unreliable. I would disagree, at least for my part, that much of the misinterpretation stems from the guy desperately hoping someone will want him. I've always tried to hedge against disappointment, by telling my self that things are never as good as they seem, despite hoping for the best. I consider it a part of my risk averse nature, which has been a contributing factor to my LS. I wouldn't doubt that many other incels are the same.

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PostPosted: 24 May 2010, 08:18 
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I think between 'creepy' and 'don't exist'.

I don't really know for sure though because I've never, nor would I would, ask them...

I think, but I don't really know the truth - I'm pretty isolated and in the dark, so to speak.

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PostPosted: 24 May 2010, 09:06 
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Simply as the "nice guy"....

No, seriously, I really don't know how women see me. I guess they probably think I'm not a nice person based on the facial expressions I make in a social setting. I'm sure every woman I've gotten close to only saw me as friend, though.


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PostPosted: 24 May 2010, 18:36 
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For certain, a mix of "creepy" and "non-existent", but more emphasis on the latter.

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PostPosted: 24 May 2010, 23:19 
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Some women who don't know me (and a few who do) think I am attractive. Generally, though, women that do know me either put me in the "creepy" or "nice" category. It's hard to generalize about which kinds of women would consider me which, but I think a very attractive woman is more likely to think "creepy" and less attractive women are more likely to think "nice", though there have been plenty of exceptions both ways. Very overweight women seem to look at me like a piece of chocolate cake with a penis (i.e., they tend to really like me and find me attractive).

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PostPosted: 25 May 2010, 07:13 
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LSPhD wrote:
Very overweight women seem to look at me like a piece of chocolate cake with a penis (i.e., they tend to really like me and find me attractive).


It's strange but it seems like the bravest women are always the least attractive. I mean, I've been astonished and appalled at some of the women that have approached me. But then later, when I think of it, I see it in a new light. I have to admire that kind of courage. These women must be smart enough to know that they will fail, with a guy that looks like like me 99% of the time , but they're still willing to try nonetheless. I, on the other hand, am unable muster the courage, when I have a 99% chance of succeeding.

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PostPosted: 28 Jun 2010, 15:39 
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For women I find physically attractive, I'd say it's somewhere between "creepy" and "I don't exist." The only women who've seemed at all interested in me, seem to have been interested in only the most common conversational way, but not in any way that would indicate it's romantic/sexual interest as contrasted with simply "platonic." So as far as attracting females in a romantic or sexual way, I'd say it's nonexistent. I simply have no evidence to support any other conclusion. Most of the time, in fact, I'll no sooner give a pretty girl the eye than she either makes a sour or hateful expression or just seems to want to walk away (which she sometimes does). I don't know -- maybe I'm giving off lustful signals which repel them, since they don't seem interested in me physically (or in any other way, for that matter).


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PostPosted: 28 Jun 2010, 19:23 
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Well, I approached a girl today, asking her where the vending machines were.

She called me 'sweetie'...*facepalm*

I think girls, even those that are much younger than me, see me as a boy and not a 'man.' Because I happen to look 16 (even though I'm in my late 20s), they think I'm sexless and not worth pursuing.

My girly voice also doesn't help. I have a very emotional voice, and it just makes people think I'm gay (which I'm not and will never be!)

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