Well I'm from the South:

1: No one walks around much except late at night.
2: You are hard pressed to find a sidewalk unlike in Europe.
3: Everyone smokes something here except me.
4: There is Europe fat and America fat. It is like comparing a fat grape to a fat watermelon.
5: Get out of New York, Dallas, and L.A. and people have real books everywhere. You'd think I lived in a library if you saw my room.
6: There is no such thing as fast internet out in the country. Fiber optic is like Gucci to a redneck. I'm lucky to have my cough* monopolized cable connection.
7: Not all people in the South are ignorant bigots stuck in a post colonial microcosm.
8: Expect most Americans to be in a hurry or angry if XYZ is not fast, efficient, and costs less than five dollars. I can apply that to the price of gas, cigs, and service of food.
9: Actually expect most Americans to be angry at you for anything. I stay away from most women because they have the worst attitudes I've ever seen. I've heard women say other women are "bitches." Well, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to see that in action as a man.
10: We do eat too much peanut butter.
11: 'round here, if you ain't got a gun, you ain't American. Seriously, the obsession with guns is out of control. Of course, I'd be first to die in the zombie apocalypse, but not the last man alive saying "ah shit, gotta reload."
12: Our national food is either fast food or pizza. I used to think it was apple pie.
13: Don't expect to find anything older than 50 years old. It'll be burned down, torn down, or left to ruin. Not like Europe with its 500 year old cathedrals.
14: Our past time is shopping.
15: We drink to get drunk.
16: Expect to be in hearing distance of at least 20 dogs.
17: Trash on the side of the road is just a part of the scenery. Don't expect it to be like Germany or Japan.
18: We drive A LOT!
19: Anyone on a motorcycle is (85%) a former airman, at least here next to the military base.
20: The civil war was about state's rights not just slavery. A Yankee told me the other day that "you guys lost the war because you're too nice."
21: Don't expect an entire aisle at the grocery store for cooking oil like in Spain. I was like "wtf, a whole aisle?" when I visited Spain in 2002.
22: Don't expect to find good beer. I don't drink it, but I hear its bad compared to German and other beers.
23: We put ice in our drinks, at least in the south. New Yorkers are obsessed with no ice. Must be those harsh winters.
24: Demographically, we have more minorities. I went to a school that was 51% black, 49% white (back then we had few Asians or Hispanics). Now it is more like 25% for each group.
25: Expect to hear on the radio at least 5 country stations, 3 Christian, 2 hard rock, 1 pop, 1 rap, 1 Norteño, and 0 trance,dance,rave,electronic station. This is why I have to listen to CDs in my car. Sigh.
26: Every third person is driving a truck.
27: Every third person on welfare or uses WIC.
28: HAM radios are stylish. Especially on the back of someone's truck. I ain't kidding either.
29: Don't take the Lord's name in vain or Dale Earnhardt's either.
30: I got accused the other day of being a backwater hick for saying these things: "Zee" instead of "Zed" and "20 cent" instead of "20 cents"
31: For heaven's sakes do not pass a school bus, a cop, or fireman.
32: Expect rubber necking for the smallest fender bender.
33: Street lights and signs are just for show. Same goes for speed limits.
34: Expect to find a soccer mom texting, drinking starbucks, yelling at 10 kids in the minivan, while speeding past you right before the divided highway ends only to break as fast as possible seconds later like the Bipolar person she is and turn into McDonald's.
35: Expect her to be riding on an under-inflated tire.
36: Expect gravy on everything.
37: Expect salty food to come with extra packets of salt.
38: In Texas expect to be handed a towel instead of a napkin.
39: It's brisket there, and unless you want to be guillotined, do not ask for any kind of sauce with the steak.
40: No Texan lives without air conditioning. You'd know why if you stepped off the plane at Houston to get to the taxi.
41: Expect mosquitoes the size of butterflies.
42: In Florida they call 'em "no see ums."
43: This is America not "the states."
44: Expect most people to be monolingual.
45: Fashion works like this: California first, East Coast last.
46: We buy from China just like every other indentured servant.
47: Yes, our tea sucks. Unless of course you like it really reallllllly sweet.
48: Did I mention diabetes and kidney stones?
49: Expect anything metal like entire railroads to be stolen in the night and sold for money at the metal dump.
50: Don't wave at people anywhere except the South.
51: Expect to come to intersections with four identically looking and almost similarly named Lutheran churches.
52: In fact expect a church, a Walgreens, and a bar on most corners.
53: Faggots are homosexuals not sticks.
54: There is English and American confusion over what are Crackers and biscuits. The same goes for chips, cookies, and sleeping policemen.
55: Even a one eyed, shit for brains, overweight, quadriplegic can have a wife and 20 children. It's not about looks around here. Hell, if I know what it is.
56: Expect at least every other stop sign to be hidden in bushes, covered in graffiti, or to be the victim of a hit and run.
57: Did I mention rolling stops?
58: Did I mention I have major road rage? *See soccer moms.
59: Expect to pay 10 dollars for a movie and 20 for the snacks.
60: If you read this far, sign your name at the top and turn it in to get your Harvard degree.

Xan.

Bullshit, if that was true, all those lonely US guys would simply move.

^^ the fashion thing.. More like it starts on the coast and moves inward.. Center of the country is always a ways behind.

61. In the South, you can't eat a salad, or much of anything, without some kind of meat like ham on it too.

Gotta love me one of those Bistro salads at the old grocery. Ham up that salad ma'am!

Haven't you seen guys who have to pay for everything on a date either? So why the hell is the other (rational) option pejoratively called "Dutch treat"? I can't imagine myself paying for a girl's ticket, meal or something else but there are men who do this eagerly.

theyoungagegroup: I have trouble believing you, I'm sorry. It sounds just crazy. Unless it's a couple going abroad, or as Tich put it, if you have expectations and think that something could happen between you and that woman, it's plain crazy. A couple of friends went to Asia a few weeks ago, and each paid their plane ticket, though they're together for 3 or 4 years now, so I have issues believing that any guy would pay a random woman a plane ticket.



I already talked about it quite often (like here or here) we don't "date" in France. You have a boyfriend/gf or you don't, but you don't "date". You're single or you have someone but you don't date around taking girls to dinner, movies etc just for the sake of it, unless she's already your girlfriend. So no, I never saw guys having to pay for everything. My friends who are in a relationship don't always share the bills at a restaurant but it's once the guy who pays, the other time it's the girl, etc. They're middle-class young people, not Bill Gates.

And I never heard of the "Dutch treat", I just looked it up on wikipedia and just noticed that then most of my friends and I we go Dutch when we're together as a group of people in a restaurant or a bar.

But well we're derailing, and there are plenty of other topics who talk about this one so I'll leave it here.

I liked your post Xanatos30. I had friends who lived in Charleston for a year and it was the time of their life. I should make the same list for my country, definitely

Yeah, I like some ham with a salad myself at times, but that habit of using grease [lard] on all that food you folks in the South eat, has to be causing health problems.

BTW, the South can be a decent place to live, but the humidity levels are too
damn high for most of us "Northerners". I prefer a dry heat myself.

The bolded part is what desperate guys think about ALL random women they meet.



Notice those last two words?

Yeah I saw. But if you ask ME if I ever saw that kind of behaviour, I'm not gonna lie.

So I did like Xanatos30... But I'm not helping Paris tourism.

1. Don’t expect anyone to speak English. Even in Paris, French people don’t speak anything but French (and grumpily do so).
2. Don’t try to speak French in Paris. If you struggle and need more than 12 seconds to utter something, people will cut you short.
3. People walk a lot and easily. Cars are a hassle for most of them and we got a pretty good system of transportation.
4. Expect to eat well. And even really well, unless you go to the numerous touristic places located on the biggest avenues. Always go into the smaller streets. You can swing a good meal for 10€. If you’re asked 15€ for a steak and fries, go somewhere else.
5. French people are generally not very warm, but Parisians are just icy cold. Don’t try to hit on a woman in a public place, cold approaches are not common and not well considered.
6. The typical Parisian is a grumpy and moaning spoilt brat. Nothing is fast enough, nothing goes well enough, he’s such a victim of a national conspiracy of incompetent people etc. Being a Parisian bus driver must be the most exhausting job of the world because people snap at them all the time.
7. Being positive is being naïve.
8. We are not very loud people but we know how to make our contempt known – a look suffices.
9. We don’t have crackers or pancakes but we have awesome bread.
10. If you want to blend in, be rude and walk with a frown meaning “I’m super busy, can’t you see, don’t bother me”.
11. Nothing is new in France. Great buildings, awesome architecture, but also old subway, stairs everywhere and definitely not handicapped-friendly.
12. We have a great sense of humor, once you get to know us and if you like black humor and cynicism.
13. Most of us despise all PC crap – you don’t like something, you’re offended by something? Don’t watch it, don’t listen to it and shut up. It’s a double-edged sword.
14. French cheese is smelly, cheese is good, don’t recoil from the bacteria, they won’t do any harm.
15. Getting drunk isn’t a hobby, binge drinking either, unless you’re 14 and at your own place.
16. Parisian waiters are amongst the worst in the world. I’m Parisian and I’m still amazed at their lack of professionalism and friendliness.
17. We love books, we have bookshops up the wazoo in the St Michel neighborhood and kindles and electronic books are for fashionable jerks.
18. You can drink GOOD wine for 10€ the bottle. Local production kicks ass and don’t mention Californian wine, ever.
19. Go to a tourism office but don’t expect the girls there to speak more than broken English. I had to help a Spanish guy there once because no one could say anything in his language (Spanish, not Swahili…)
20. If you’re a woman, expect to be hit on by junkies and meth heads in the subway, and often very aggressively – and be called a “salope” at the end of the “socialization” process.
21. French people are slim, traditionally. Being fat means being 70kg or more. Don’t expect anything to be suited to fat people – seats, seatbelts, turnstiles, clothes, shoes…
22. If you’re handicapped, you can’t easily take the train, the plane, the subway or the R.E.R. Just take the bus and consider yourself happy if the bus driver accepts you in because he can leave you on the sidewalk if he chooses to.
23. Don’t hang out in the north of Paris after dark, or in train stations.
24. Paris is a little Africa, if you’re racist or white supremacist and snort at the sight of a black man, don’t trouble yourself going there.
25. We think one good glass of wine is worth a thousand beers.
26. Sales assistants hate people and shouldn’t be bothered in any case.
27. Unless you’re masochistic, don’t try to enter a high-class shop like Hermès or Chanel if you don’t look like you come from the 6th page of the last issue of Vogue. Avoid Place Vendôme overall.
28. Being casually dressed is a crime against fashion, and therefore, mankind. Wearing jogging suits is just unthinkable.
29. Learn the French mantra: French trains are great, but French trains are late.
30. Le Marais is THE area of Paris to see, but skip it if you’re homophobic.
31. Be prepared to suffer if you’re a vegetarian: we’re not veggie-friendly AT ALL. If you ask a vegetarian dish, be sure the cook will add some fish sauce on it and wonder why you’re so angry.
32. A good customer is one that doesn’t ask anything and sucks it up before leaving the place and whining about the lack of proper service.
33. Information desks are a rare thing.
34. We love cooking and we’re great at it. Be prepared to find two aisles dedicated to moutarde and four, to cheese.
35. Maps and street names are quite okay, but take a GPS in case as no one will give you directions.

Loved the lists, Xanatos and Dsea (& Zeek).

Ever read Bill Bryson's travel books? I've read these - Neither Here nor There: Travels in Europe and I'm a Stranger Here Myself: Notes on Returning to America After 20 Years Away. Really interesting read and quite funny too, especially for people like me who are too broke to travel.

starting tomorrow i'll be in Paris for 3 days, first time there, a lot to see, very curious

Sputnik, I heard of the first book you mentioned but never read anything from that author. As soon as I have a free spot on my reading list, I'll try to find it. I also wanted to read a book from an American guy who went to France, I already forgot the name but it's funny to see a foreigner's view on one's country

Mitchell, I hope you'll enjoy it.

Which is why I think I might speak Irish just for the hell of it the next time I'm in Paris.

very impressed by Paris, the momumental buildings, the big boulevards, the seine, all the history, the cosy parks and little shops, restaurants...

i'm definitely going back but then i'm staying longer and while take my time more because now everything was a bit too rushed