Because when you're logged on to online dating site you're getting to view hundreds or thousands of profiles in one sitting. Giving someone enough information lets them know if they might be interested in the kind of person the profile describes. Leaving out generic information that applies to everyone (I like going out to eat, for example) frees up the space to get more specific and talk about who you really are, what makes you unique and what sort of person you're interested in.

Hundreds or _thousands_ of profiles? Do people really do that?

When I check out women on dating sites, which is not often, I check out maybe ten or twenty at most.

I don't think I would obsessively click through hundreds, but the option to do so (in my area, at least) is there. Can't hurt to put your best foot forward, especially in a big dating pool.

Dude, use a spell check program. Misspelling "intelligent" when you claim to be it is three strikes in one.

A great example of what not to do in your intro, courtesy of someone nice enough to mail me.

Class.

My roommate is "pestering" me to go to this "speed dating" thing that is going on in some uber-alpha-type of bar deep, deep in the Northside of Fresno.

I keep telling him "No, man" He keeps telling me that I have a ton to offer, and I need to get out more. He tells me that I am a guy who is that glass o' wine......you have to swirl it in the glass, let the "air" hit it for a few minutes........and then subtle perfection awaits to those who can stand to wait a few to check me out.

This is why I tell him speed dating would be 'useless' in this scenario. You have what, thirty seconds to talk to the person, and like all of these types of contests..........two or three dudes are gonna have "all" the women wanting them, AND since this is Fresno, there will be ten-trillion dudes and about fifteen women.

Exxie, thank you for putting the time and effort into posting all your great suggestions.

However (you knew it was coming), I was on match.com for almost a year. I was on plentyoffish.com for 365 days. I had a funny, sincere, non-pretentious ad that was approved by a couple of close friends (including a woman who had been on many dates). I also posted several good, clear, recent photos that showed me in various aspects of my life. I got a grand total of zero responses on both sites, except for a few email blasts from hookers and women from overseas looking for a sugardaddy. I also sent my profile to quite a number of women, and got zero replies.

I understand that it's a numbers game, but what I found is that any woman worth dating is looking for a handsome, full-head-of-hair, financially stable, tall (at least 5"11') guy who probably owns his home, has a 401-k, stock options, and drives a really cool car. Unfortunately, I fall into none of these catagories. Frankly, I can't really blame any woman for wanting her Prince Charming, especially as she gets older. The myth that older women will "settle" for a Nice Guy who is still "chasing his passion" but not making a living at it is pure hogwash. So I suppose I have no right to whine about my lack of success. We all make choices in life, and because I chose the life of an artist (I'm an actor and writer who can barely pay his rent), I have to suffer the consequences.

By the way, if you're interested in seeing my original ad, I'm happy to email it to you if I can find it.

I would be more than happy to help you work up your online dating profile, provided you redact personal information, please!

Feel free to either post it here or PM it to me.

POF is shit. Utterly shit. If you're in a reasonable sized city, try Ok Cupid. It's free and less insane than POF.

It is totally, totally a numbers game. Even being a happy girl whose profile includes being obsessed with sex and cake, I've got to send out 10-15 messages to get something back that then might result in a date. I would say try leaving the window open on your desktop and try sending out a message everytime you do send an email or post here or whatever. Make it a bit of a habit. Surf the net, message a girl. Pay a bill online, message a girl. It's a bit of a slog but if you get in the habit of having the window open and popping onto it while you're messing about online it gets to be a habit instead of a job.

I've created a profile on POF a few days ago. Partly as an experiment (being honest, doing it as myself and using my own picture) and partly because there's a part of me who wants to give myself one last shot at meeting some members of the opposite sex, even if connecting platonically (at first). No hits yet. It's a last ditch effort before paying for it becomes a set option.

This is basically my third time in my life and the first time in about nine years I've used a dating service. The two before this were Lavalife and Campus Kiss. I ended up chatting one girl about nine years ago on Campus Kiss...one drawback, she lived in North Carolina and the conversation generally went nowhere. I just remember she said she 'smoked weed'. This was back when I could/did too. I thought I had a connection but the logistics were out of the question.

Thanks, Exxie. I'll see what I can send you.

Another site I think is crap is E-harmony.com. I took their so-called personality/compatibility questionaire a few years ago and was rejected. They told me "a small percentage of our repondents won't be suitable for our members." I guess I fell into that small percentage. What that site really is is a Christian dating site in disguise. The clown that runs it ("Dr." Neil Clark Warren) will never admit it, but I remember when I took their quiz, it asked me all sorts of questions about my religious beliefs. Because I'm an atheist, that disqualified me altogether. Honestly, I couldn't care less.

I've looked at OK Cupid, but I thought that was another pay site. I'll check it out again.

Alone. I am a Christian, and they "rejected" me too.

Yeah, they got sued for refusing to make same sex matches an option by places that have sexual orientation discrimination laws. Props, California. All in all, they're dicks.

Ok Cupid is my favorite. It's free, but the paid version is $10 a month a pretty worthwhile, if you'll be using it a lot.

eHarmony is actually a site that sounds pretty crappy on paper that's a lot better in practice. Met my first girlfriend there. Their matching system is kinda silly. It should just let you see anyone you want to see instead of slowly feeding you matches. And the rejection is kind of weird. Though I should note that I put "Neither religious of spiritual" at first and didn't get rejected. It should be noted that, as silly as their matching system is, their research was only geared towards straight couples, so they were never really in a position to match up gay people.

Match.com is prolly the second best. So if you get rejected by eHarmony, go there. Free sites have some possibility, but they are chock full of fake profiles and attention whores. Pay sites will have you wasting less time, but paying money. And free sites will have you wasting a lot of time, but paying no money. Depends on what you value more. You're a lot more likely to actually get a date from a pay site, though.

Reddit is here to help!

http://www.reddit.com/r/OkCupid/comment ... f_dos_and/

I could not believe this shitty whore dispensing dating tips. Can any of you guys think that your life experience and reality somewhat resembles this human excrement. Also I love how she spits at that alone99 by saying please redact any personal info before sending it to me. That means she really really cares about you but does not even want to learn your name. Oh whore, please help us, please.